Who's Pete Perfect in the pub industry then?
Perhaps it's my slightly warped sense of humour, but the idea of 'Wacky Races' as a metaphor for the pub sector tickles my funny-bone no end.
For those readers under 30, the Hanna-Barbera cartoon series - essential viewing during my schooldays - sees a variety of kookily-named cars being driven across America by still more bizarrely monikered characters, including Lazy Luke and Blubber Bear in the Arkansas Chuggabug, Pete Perfect in the Turbo Terrific, and the infamous Dick Dastardly and Muttley in the Mean Machine '00'.
Why such a motley assortment of automotive 'ne'er do wells' to represent the pub industry? The boss of a medium-sized managed pub operator with whom I was speaking last week thought it apt as a metaphor for the sort of jostling for dominance that goes on between companies, swapping rankings at a head-spinning pace.
Victories in 'Wacky Races' were spread across the grid. One minute there would be the Ant Hill Mob in the Bulletproof Bomb; next up would be Sergeant Blast and Private Meekley in the Army Surplus Special, while Penelope Pitstop in the Compact Pussycat was to be seen crossing the line first in another episode.
Quite who in the pub sector could be represented by the Gruesome Twosome in the Creepy Coupe I'll leave to others to decide, but behind the joke lies a serious point about survivability.
The debt-laden nature of some pub companies means they could end up being classified as 'DNF', or 'Did Not Finish'.
Those companies that have chosen conservative financing strategies and survived the economic downturn thus far are doubtless well placed to continue and prosper. And who knows, maybe they'll go on to win the wackiest of races?
