Pub Bitch: The Theatre of Dreams... for some
Fortune favours the brave
With football mania now reaching fever pitch, US brewer Budweiser is pulling out all the stops to be the beer of the beautiful game. And when The Publican was invited to enter a team in the Budweiser six-a-side cup, we were slightly starstruck. A chance to play on the "hallowed" Old Trafford turf, followed by dinner with "Manchester United legends". Speculation on the identity of said legends ran rife… Cantona? Robson? Beckham? Maybe even Denis Irwin? Shortly before the big day, all was revealed. The guest of honour was to be none other than Bobby Charlton! The cream of the pub trade's ball-artists awaited the arrival of England's 1966 World Cup hero with bated breath, items of Charlton memorabilia at the ready for the great man's autograph. Then the moment arrived. "Please give a warm welcome to a true United legend… (drum roll)… Quinton Fortune!" Fortune, 33, revealed in a Q&A session that he had recently been "released" from his contract with Doncaster Rovers. No-one had the heart to ask him what had happened to Sir Bobby.
Pride and passion. Well, passion
Talking of the Budweiser Cup, I should mention the Publican team's 'performance'. After weeks of big talk from certain quarters about playing for Essex and scoring in regional cup finals in 1978, the squad turned out to be the most shocking collection of footballing talent ever assembled. Achievements on the day included being the only team without a proper kit ('Proud of Pubs' T-shirts don't count apparently), shipping nine goals in a 10-minute game, and being the only team to lose all its matches. Marvin 'Superstar' Roberts did his best to stop the rot, scoring four of the team's five goals, but even he was unable to convert a gilt-edged chance in the pub hacks' derby against 'the other place' — a match The Publican lost 1-0. Still, it was a hugely enjoyable day and if we're ever invited back we will be better, we promise! Congratulations meanwhile to the Town & City team, who won the final on penalties — and a VIP trip to the World Cup quarter-finals in South Africa. (See bottom of page for more pictures from the day).
Cunning as a fox
Far be it from me (you always start things like that. Ed) to suggest Greene King's marketing department has been indulging in a bit of the ol' guerrilla tactics, but that's the way it seems from this photo, taken at a recent cricket match between Surrey and Gloucestershire. With ground and shirt sponsorship courtesy of Midlands brewer — and Greene King rival — Marston's in abundant evidence, it seems a sly fox got in on the act. Literally. Foxes are all the rage in East Anglia; the Suffolk-based brewer's Old Speckled Hen cask ale brand sponsors the station idents on satellite TV comedy channel Dave, using a bemused-looking fox. It seems the animal that wandered into the action at the Oval was similarly perplexed. It clearly isn't interested in the game. Or was it just being paid to look like that…?
Mulholland 1 Paxman 0
Professional pub-going MP Greg Mulholland never misses a trick, does he? During an event to launch National Pub Week last week the Lib Dem couldn't resist mentioning an election night clash he'd apparently had with TV pitbull Jeremy Paxman. Mulholland, who incidentally has taken the art of tweeting to new levels and informs his adoring followers of his every move in Westminster, explained that he had gone straight from his local pub, where he'd been enjoying a celebratory drink after his re-election, to Leeds market at 9am in order to appear on the telly. "Apparently I did very well and got the better of him (Paxman)," the MP said, bashfully. Unfortunately we missed the encounter, but if anyone can point us in the direction of the footage, you know where to find us…
