Pub Bitch: Political shenanigans
Can I phone a friend?
Tory toff Tobias Ellwood (and licensing minister-in-waiting — Gawd help us) did 'imself proud at last week's lively Parliamentary CAMRA debate. Miffed he'd not received the questions in advance, the Bournemouth East member effectively 'fessed up that he didn't know what the hell he was talking about and would have to "consult colleagues" for some answers. "I will not bluff you," he told the audience. Debate chairman Greg Mulholland said knowing the questions in advance could be seen as "cheating" and it was "not a memory test". Ellwood, a former army captain, was furious. "That's daft and slightly churlish," he retorted. Seeing as the bash had advertised itself as being akin to the Beeb's Question Time, I think Mulholland's point was well made…
Greg says it with keyrings
Staying with the Leeds MP, Mulholland isn't shy of rubbing people up the wrong way, as his run-in with Carlsberg UK is proving. The MP described as 'ludicrous' the suggestion from Isaac Sheps, the brewer's boss, that his call to boycott its products could threaten other jobs in the company. Mulholland has gone one step further, doing a tie-up with a manufacturer to produce bottle opener keyrings in support of his campaign against the closure of the Leeds brewery. Says 'Gareth', one of KeyringsKings' founders: "I was disgusted to hear of Carlsberg's decision to abandon over a century of tradition, and wanted to make sure we supported the campaign. What better way than a reminder to boycott every time you open a bottle of beer?" Won't be one of Carlsberg's though, will it?
Talking tough
Still at Westminster, GMB general secretary Paul Kenny, a man whose appearance and style of delivery are not a million miles from tough-guy actor Ray Winstone, is clearly up for a fight. Speaking to licensees and MPs last week he laughed off attempts by the BBPA to derail the union's call for industrial action with their claims that a strike might be just a teensy bit unlawful. Producing the letter in the Parliamentary meeting, he said: "The best thing about this is that it's got the address on it, so at least that's one place we know where to picket." He then noted that Titanic Brewery is a BBPA member, "I hope that's an omen for them," he chirped. The gloves are well and truly off...
Cops target tossers
The Newmarket Safer Neighbourhood Team hailed its recent 'impact days', which saw a crackdown on bad behaviour resulting from drink and drug abuse, as a huge success, despite only two arrests. The press blurb said the police presence two weekends ago meant incidents were "minimal". It also told of "many" pubs being visited and issued with "informal warnings" about correct signage, "such as no-smoking signs and notices about leaving premises quietly". Never mind the issue of priorities, the "days of action" came as local police and councils across Suffolk signed up to support BBC Radio Suffolk's fabulously named 'Don't Be A Tosser' campaign, which tries to persuade people across the county not to drop litter. Obviously.
Quote of the week
"When pubs put on lap dancing it's like when they try to do Thai food: disappointingly not exotic and the meat is out of date." Jeff Maysh of Loaded magazine on pubs as lap-dancing venues.
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