Service and quality - who needs it?

In this current period of introspection our industry spokesmen are constantly coming up with new theories as to why the trade is dying on it's feet. Seems the latest idea is that it's all about "Service & Quality". Is it really?

Just up the road from where I live there's a pub called the Rugger Tavern, a delightful traditional pub built in the early 1900s. I've spent many a happy hour in there since my youth and witnessed it's recent decline until the day it became an Indian restaurant.

In it's heyday it was run for several decades by landlord 'Wash' Harris, a miserable cantankerous old bugger with a monstrous beer gut who stood for no nonsense. He'd throw you out simply because he didn't like the look of you and his list of barred ex-customers ran to several volumes. His welcoming grumble was less than friendly, he served no food whatsoever and he mixed the slops back in with your next pint, not that many dared to complain.

Yet the pub was always fairly busy and popular with a broad spectrum of drinkers right up until Wash's death at a ripe old age. Why? Several reasons really. The pub was what many people would call 'grotty' but that's what we all seemed to like about the place. It had never changed one iota since the day it first opened. Open fires, bare floorboards, wooden bench seating and it's original tables & chairs. It even had the old bell push-buttons, still working, from an era when you rang for service at your table.

In short it had character, right down to old Wash himself. You overlooked his shortcomings because he was an important part of the overall experience. The customers were always friendly and mixed seamlessly with one another in the days when strangers were never strangers in a real pub.

Sometime in the 80's new landlords knocked all the rooms into one and gave the pub a complete refit with an island servery and a heavy dose of mock-Victoriana. It must be said that the 'service and quality' did rise spectacularly. But its true ambience was lost forever.

Now I'm not saying service & quality aren't important. If you are running a gastro-pub then of course it is. In a modern brasserie-style bar the average punter with a laptop also demands an above-average standard of service to justify the £4.95 he's blown on his foaming beaker of latte macchiato.

But in most British pubs a different ethos applies. Traditionally landlord and customer, from whatever walk of life, have always treated one another on equal terms. A clean glass and a modicum of politeness will amply suffice.

In food-led pubs diners neither expect nor desire silver service standards when they're tucking into their Early-Eater 2-for-1 Special at £3.95 (my God, how do these places make any profit?). And they couldn't give a monkey's what their waitress's first name is, they simply wanna be fed.

Most drinkers are more concerned with getting a full pint than whether or not it comes in the right glass. Many are either too sozzled or plain ignorant to recognise exceptional service even if you took them home and tucked them into bed at the end of the night.

I know the last thing I want in a pub is an extra large helping of groveling servility. "Get off you knees man, and give me a top-up on that one". And my pet hate is being served with those nasty paper doileys under the glass. "This is the Dog & Hedgehog, not the bleedin' Savoy!"

Let's take JDW, for example. It's not often I praise Wetherspoon's pubs but on service they seem to have the balance about right. Admittedly it's been a while since I went in one, but in whichever of the clone towns I've sampled JDW's the casual and friendly service does strike a warm note. Similarly their pub-grub is served free from pretentious showiness.

My point is that we need to look elsewhere to find out where it all went wrong. Turning our backs on basic traditions that have served the trade well for hundreds of years will only hasten the road to ruin.