Pub Bitch: 'Lick my face'
Party politics
Not that we're into conspiracy theories or anything here at Pub Bitch, but while there were plenty of Big Guns out in force at the British Beer & Pub Association's (BBPA) black-tie bash last week — Marston's, Punch Taverns, Fuller's et al — there was one large company (and a BBPA member to boot) which appeared not to have shelled out on a table. Diageo. The drinks leviathan hasn't exactly seen eye-to-eye with the industry's leading trade organisation in recent weeks, thanks to its stance on alcohol duty, and its 'no show' at the swanky affair, held in the Hilton hotel on London's posh Park Lane, raised a few eyebrows. The fact that it baled out of a BBPA council meeting on the same day only added fuel to the fire…
Waiting in the wings?
Staying at the BBPA do, guest speaker Michael Portillo cut a rather strange comic turn, but when the former chief secretary to the Treasury talked politics he came into his own. He managed to get a few genuine laughs when discussing the Liberal Democrats, who he said were clearly dead chuffed at being in power after nearly a century in the political wilderness. And with nearly half the party's MPs currently holding ministerial positions it would only be a matter of time before those on the back benches got given go, Portillo opined. All eyes — well, OK, mine — turned to Greg Mulholland, Lib Dem MP and professional pubco baiter, to gauge his reaction. He merely smiled, enigmatically. His turn may yet come…
Two-thirds real
Pete Brown, regular columnist for The Publican (and award winning writer. Don't forget that bit. Ed), tweeted a rather amusing message last week from a boozer in South Wales last week. "Just ordered pint of real cider in an Abergavenny pub," he wrote. "Pint two-thirds full. Barmaid: 'Aw, it's gone off. Shall I top it up with Strongbow?'" Great to know that some people still couldn't give a tinker's cuss about standards…
Lick my face
A-ha! Alan Partridge, my favourite TV and radio presenter, is back. After falling on hard times a decade ago following a row with a senior BBC suit, it's been confirmed from next month Partridge is to front 12 short web TV shows on www.fostersfunny.co.uk, in association with Foster's. Partridge said he was delighted that his "groundbreaking" radio segment Mid-Morning Matters will be accessible to billions via the internet. He added: "That it has taken Foster's to help realise my dream of joining the information superhighway is a damning indictment of the established broadcasters, whose shabby treatment of me on September 10, 2001, was frankly shabby. I made dozens of calls the next day, all of which were ignored. My appreciation must go to Armando Iannucci and Baby Cow for ignoring the lies, God bless them. In the meantime I look forward to 'hanging out 'n' chillin'' with the MySpace generation."
Spot the difference
With Samuel Smith's under fire for pursuing neighbouring Yorkshire microbrewer Cropton Brewery over its use of the county's white rose on its bottle labels in a copyright battle, it's interesting to see Swindon brewer Arkell's come up with a Czech-style Pilsner lager. Pilsner Arkell? Geddit? I can see SABMiller's lawyers having a field day with that one…
Unintentional obscenity
We all know about email security and how some messages get blocked because they contain rude words, but sometimes these IT systems can take things a bit far. An email sent to an individual in North Tyneside council with the subject line 'PASS hologram levy' failed to get by the local authority's quarantine system because, and I quote, "the message 'PASS hologram levy' contains 'ass hol'". You couldn't make it up…
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