I met my wife whilst working in Kenya; we got married nine months later in Mombasa and the rest is, as they say, history. She is four foot eleven and as feisty as they come.
Last week I was perched on a bar stool watching her 'at work'; she was dealing with an awkward customer in her own inimitable style. The gentleman concerned was at least six foot tall whilst his frame suggested that the gym was his second home.
It was comical in many ways; his unease was all too apparent as he looked down at this diminutive figure who, seemingly oblivious to his size, was intent on telling him exactly what she thought of him. On a couple of occasions he attempted to get a word in but was abruptly cut short; it was clear to all that my wife had things to say and she was in no mood to be side tracked.
I smiled as I reflected that men always seem to know how to react to other men, aggression frequently being the initial instinct. They appear much less sure of themselves when confronted by a woman. The gentleman eventually made his apologies, promised profusely that he would behave himself and thanked my wife for giving him yet another chance.
My wife returned to the bar; "Everything all right?" I enquired. "That's the last time I'm speaking to him" she said. "Next time he's gone."
I looked at her and felt so proud; her strength was there for all to see. My wife is not a lady to mess with, believe you me. I should know, I've been married to her for twenty years!
It led me recall a previous incident where I was having some 'difficulties' with a couple of lads. Unbeknown to me, one of them was in the process of getting behind me with a view to doing something silly.
Cue the arrival of my wife from the other side of the bar; with her trusty rolling pin, the one and only time the WMD (weapon of mass destruction) option has had to be utilised. When my wife is fired up she can be a daunting prospect for anybody; 'tooled up' she becomes an adversary to be reckoned with, a truly formidable foe.
A couple of well placed blows and the said gentleman and his accomplice beat a hasty retreat. They clearly weren't anticipating a 'counter attack' and were unsure how to react. Both obviously concluded that flight was probably the most sensible option; oh how right they were!
We were left standing in the middle of the room looking at each other, then for some inexplicable reason I just burst out laughing. It might have been the sight of my wife standing there with the rolling pin in her hand, or simply stress brought on from the confrontation.
Either way, I had nothing but total admiration for a woman who truly 'stood by her man'. Needless to say she got a well deserved hug and I still smile whenever I recall the incident.
I give you this example because it is something I would never have believed my wife capable of. I thought I knew everything there was to know about her prior to taking on the pub, in truth I knew little.
She continually surprises me; and I find myself smiling in admiration at her strength and unbridled determination to make her business succeed despite all the well publicised problems.
The incident also highlights the fact that a decision to take on a pub will inevitably throw up a number of unique challenges; as in our case, you frequently won't know how you'll react until the time comes along.
Can the decision to run a pub be a marriage breaker? Undoubtedly, in some cases at least because I don't think any of us truly appreciate what's really involved when we embark down this road.
So, for any couple out there thinking about taking on a pub for the first time I would say this. Make sure it is something you both want to do because the level of commitment required will test your relationship with your partner to the full; be in no doubt about that.
I'm sure that the decision to run a pub has, over the years, led to a parting of the ways for a number of couples. It is a learning experience like no other, the way each of you cope with the inevitable pressures that arise will tell you a great deal about both yourself and your 'other half'.
Running a pub can, as we all know, be a fantastic life changing experience; but let's be honest, for many of us none of it would be possible without the support of a strong woman.
So, on behalf of all of us blokes out there who are fortunate enough to still have 'two loves' in our lives, let me say this.
Gentlemen, lift your glasses; a toast, 'to strong women, wherever they may be!'
Pork pies
I came across a pork pie recipe the other day and was struck by how simple it looked.
For the remainder of the day I had this vision of homemade pork pies for sale in the pub. We don't have a trade kitchen in the pub so I knocked up a batch at home and had them on display in the bar for the England game; they sold out in no time at all.
The customers loved them and didn't mind paying a little extra because they knew they were homemade. (For me personally it was very rewarding to see customers clearly enjoying a product that I had taken the time to make myself).
It takes about twenty five minutes to make them and twenty five minutes to cook them. They are best served chilled so they can be cooked the day before; bang a few pickled onions on the plate together with some spring onions and some green relish/chutney and you've got a pork pie platter; perfect with a pint of real ale!
Try some for the Germany game, they will sell believe you me, but ensure you make enough because inevitably we'll be going into extra time and penalties, won't we?