Pub bitch: Skinny Blonde bares all Down Under
Whitbread push's for grammer
Three hearty cheers to Whitbread for launching its apprenticeship programme, which will give more than 3,000 of its employees new qualifications by the end of this year.The press release helpfully informs me that among these will be "NVQ's and certificates in adult numeracy and literacy". Great news. The thing is - and I know I'm being a bit anal here - maybe the Whitbread press office should co-opt some of those newly literate employees to help out with advice on certain grammatical nuances, in this case apostrophe placement. 'NVQs' is merely a plural, not a possessive, guys.
Still, you know what they say about people in glass house's…
One for the lads
A trio of Aussie lads are claiming a global first with their Skinny Blonde bottled beer. "What's so special about that then?" you might quite reasonably enquire. Well, the bottle comes complete with a specially inked label featuring a 50s-style pin-up blonde girl in a red bikini which fades away as the bottle warms up. The bikini that is, not the girl. The three lads Down Under claim their 'baring all' innovation is unique, but this is being refuted. A South African chap claims he once used beer glasses embossed with images of fully clothed ladies who turned naked as you drained the vessel, apparently a ploy to encourage punters to drink more and drink it quickly. Those were the days…
Silly but serious
I always knew beer was healthy, but Courage's new ads take things a step further. The brand's new advertising campaign links up with urological cancer charity UCARE to highlight the issue of prostate cancer, which is diagnosed in 35,000 men every year. Posters, which can be hung on the walls above urinals, are going up in more than 500 men's toilets reminding the boys to pay attention to their waterworks and stressing the importance of regular check-ups. Craig Sammells from Courage says: "We hope that the light-hearted picture will resonate with men and highlight the very serious message. The earlier men get checked out, the more likely the cancer can be treated." Indeed…
No Nonsense? Are you sure?
John Smith's, described by its Scottish & Newcastle masters as "the No Nonsense ale" wot "famously sponsors the Grand National and the People's Race at Aintree", press-released plans last Wednesday to stem the haemorrhaging of beer sales. A major brand premiumisation programme "spearheaded by a new, ground-breaking equestrian sponsorship, the John Smith's People's Polo tournament" at Great Windsor Park, complete with pouring rights for the beer and renaming the "famous" Smith's Lawn the John Smith's Lawn is on the way. Wow, that sounds really goo… no wait, hang on a mo'… of course, it was a bleedin' April Fool's, weren't it? Nearly, boys, nearly…
A quick calf-pint
In possibly the most tenuous link with the pub trade for a while I came across this artwork by Caroline Shotton, labelled "one of the most talented, contemporary British artists of recent times" (no, I'd never heard of her either). Moved by the plight of UK pubs — oh, bless her — Shotton decided to rework Edward Hopper's famous 1942 painting Nighthawks, replacing human drinkers in the bar with her trademark image, the humble bovine. Her version, entitled Last Udders At The Bar (geddit?) "is helping to create a talking point for pub and bar owners", she intones, adding her work "always gets tongues wagging". Given that her limited-edition prints are available at the not-insignificant cost of £575 a pop we doubt many pub-goers will be chatting about them anytime soon…
