I have just been visited by the smoking police while I was out. A woman from the local borough council with the neat title 'smoke-free projects officer' called in to see how I was progressing with the ban. She noticed I hadn't got the statutory notices up and has kindly provided me with some. This is quite strange really considering that only last week someone from the brewery kindly popped in to point out I'd not got the statutory signs up and they too gave me some signs to put up.
I must have about 20 signs in my drawer now.
It is reassuring how kind and thoughtful these people are to make sure that I am not running fast and loose and not fulfilling my legal responsibilities.
Naturally I have three illuminated signs on each exit pointing out that the door is indeed an exit. If there is a fire I am comforted that bewildered customers will seek out the appropriate sign, follow it to the muster station with a green sign depicting a family group and await being checked off the register. I understand the need to make sure people are safe.
But increasingly I am inclined to follow Darwinian evolutionary theory that suggests that if people are totally oblivious to the blindingly obvious they should actually remove themselves from the gene pool. I've no wish to see people burnt or hurt but I cannot help but think that if they are really so stupid that they are unable to realise that the door they came in, the obvious one in the corner of the room with glass and wood and a highly visible handle, is an exit, then, should they survive a fire or natural disaster they might inadvertently procreate their stupidity ensuring its survival for future generations.
Some one should make a concerted effort to weed out the idiots.
I am not suggesting we have a perverted kind of entrance exam or a minimum base ability ~ no unprotected sex for people without O-levels for example.
But I do think if we can eliminate the idiots we can avoid having to put up idiotic signs and avoid the need for smoke-free projects officers.