Joker

One fine day in Ireland, a guy out golfing gets up to the 16th hole. He tees up and cranks one, which goes into the woods on the side of the fairway.

Looking for his ball he comes across this little guy with a huge knot on his head and the golf ball lying right beside him.

"Goodness," says the golfer, trying to revive the poor guy. Reviving slightly, the little guy says, "Well, you caught me fair and square. I'm a leprechaun. And I'll grant you three wishes."

The man says, "I can't take anything - I'm just glad I didn't hurt you too badly." Watching the golfer depart, the leprechaun thinks, "Well, he's a nice guy, and he did help me, so I have to return the favour. I'll give him the three things I'd want: unlimited money, a fabulous golf game and a great sex life." A year elapses, and the same golfer is out playing the 16th hole. He hits a ball into the same woods and goes searching for it. When he finds it he also spots the little guy and asks how he is doing. The leprechaun says, "I'm fine - how's your golf game?"

"Great! I hit under par every time," says the golfer. "I did that for you," responds the leprechaun, "And how is your money holding out?"

"Whenever I put my hand in my pocket, I pull out a hundred-pound note!" the golfer replies. The leprechaun smiles: "I did that for you. And how's your sex life?" The golfer looks at him shyly and says, "Well, maybe once or twice a week." Floored, the leprechaun stammers, "Once or twice a week?" The golfer looks sheepish and says, "Well, it's not too bad for a Catholic priest in a small parish."