Women are

no small beer Mark Woodhouse, vice-chairman of Hall & Woodhouse, turns journalist as the latest contributor to our Good For Beer series. Here he...

no small beer

Mark Woodhouse, vice-chairman of Hall & Woodhouse, turns journalist as the latest contributor to our Good For Beer series. Here he ponders the decisions of building a new brewery and considers how women represent a prime opportunity to grow sales

The early evening sun starts to cast shadows across the shimmering Dart, a dragonfly flits past, a swallow kisses the water and rowdy children play on the river bank. An unmistakable noise alerts me of something good to come: it's the sound of a bottle opened. It sneezes, as if it were glad to be free of its crown.

The liquid poured is unmistakable, auburn in colour, gently effervescing, topped with a creamy white hat it must be that most wonderful of drinks: English ale. Ah, but am I mistaken? The nose is fruity, the flavour also and it tastes of peaches and all is confirmed by a peep at the label. One would not have been surprised to occasion such a beer in Belgium, but England? How things have changed in the beer market in recent years.

Who will drink beer in 30 years?

This gets me to thinking always dangerous with a glass in hand but who will be drinking beer in 10, 20 or even 30 years' time? This is a tricky question if, as a family brewer, your generation's lot is to consider a replacement of your 100-year-old brewery at a considerable cost.

So what of the market? It seems relatively stable, customers are trading up with quality offsetting quantity. A less subtle shift, though, is the move to drinking at home, but pubs are fighting back by offering better quality and value food all washed down with a pint; or is it a glass of wine?

However, the on-trade does seem to be suffering a steady 2% decline and led by ale, which the soothsayers of doom say has yet to 'bottom out. This doesn't sound like good news for an ale brewer with pubs, but then this is only half the picture. The other half, the take-home trade, is doing rather well for bottled ale, but it is only a small market. This category is encouraged greatly by Tesco, not perhaps everyone's idea of an easy bedfellow, but one to whom brewers owe a debt of gratitude.

So where's the growth going to come from to keep this brewery full? Beer with food that's going down well. On second thoughts, I don't see the wine industry relying too heavily on Boeuf Bourguignon and coq au vin for sales. That's not to say that there are not wonderful opportunities for chefs and diners alike to experiment with beer.

And what about the lager boys? Could we get them drinking ale? Well, that's the view of some brewers who have introduced a range of light and cooler ales. The Campaign for Real Ale (Camra) then, that's the answer. It will help us grow the market it has done it before, it can do it again. But if all the Camra members were to drink an extra pint of ale a day, that would just about halt the annual decline.

Women's attitudes to beer

There could be another way, though. On a recent trip to Munich, it appeared that women's attitudes to beer, or 'liquid bread as the Bavarians refer to it, are somewhat different to ours. This was exemplified by two 'grey ladies, whose demeanour was anything but, and on arriving at a cafe mid-afternoon, spurned the coffee and cakes for beer and pretzels. My eye was soon diverted by the arrival of two attractive young ladies sporting mini dirndls, which even the FT was forced to concede as being 'drop dead gorgeous. They too had no truck for any refreshment other than beer.

With roughly half the population being of the fairer persuasion and only 1% admitting to drinking beer, this must be our opportunity.

So why don't more girls drink beer? Is it too bitter, too gassy, not strong enough, poorly marketed or does it make you fat?

Having encouraged many ladies to try our beers, particularly the fruity ones, such as I am drinking now, the response has been one of disbelief: 'I didn't know beer could taste so good. I am therefore inclined to believe that the reason women do not drink beer is for none other than it makes you fat. Us blokes know that it's not the beer that makes us grow but the fish and chips on the way home.

So then, if we can convince the 'wibbly wobbly clubs and the slimming mags that beer really is good for you and doesn't make you fat, that's it the beer market will double and wine will be consigned to less civilised parts of the world.

Time for a bit of afters

By now, the first stars are peeping out from behind a cloud and reflections start to play on the mirror-calm river. Swallows are replaced by bats and children by locals in the riverside pub, their gentle chatter only interrupted when the licensee clangs his bell and calls, 'Time at the bar. Glasses are drained, fags stubbed out and all bid farewell, at least until the morrow. Surely this pastoral scene will last forever? And, as for me a bit of afters: a bottle sneezes, I don't mind if I do.

Now, how big shall we make this brewery?